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Latest News

14 / 04 / 2019
Fantasy F1:
The results from the third race in China are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Azerbaijan in 2 weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 26th April.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the races so far - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

31 / 03 / 2019
Fantasy F1:
The results from the second race in Bahrain are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is China in 2 weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 12th April.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed the first two races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

17 / 03 / 2019
Fantasy F1:
The results from the first race in Australia are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Second race is Bahrain in 2 weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 29th March.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed the first race - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

I've reduced the weightings for Alfa Romeo because they were stronger than I expected.

09 / 03 / 2019
Fantasy F1:
The 2019 season is now open for entries! You can change your team as often as you like so you might as well pick a team now while you're thinking about it. You can always read the rules later! You have until midnight GMT on Friday night (15th) to qualify for the first race in Australia.

25 / 11 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the final race in Abu Dhabi are in, and we have our winners! Check the results or see where your team finished.

We'll be back for a new season shortly before the real championship starts, in March 2019.

11 / 11 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the twentieth race in Brazil are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Just one race to go - Abu Dhabi in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 23rd November.

28 / 10 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the nineteenth race in Mexico are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Only two races to go - next race is Brazil in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 9th November.

22 / 10 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the eighteenth race in Austin are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Mexico NEXT WEEKEND! Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 26th October.

You can still enter a new team for the final three races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

07 / 10 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the seventeenth race in Japan are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Austin in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 19th October.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

*** Some of the weightings have been tweaked *** for the final four races - check the league page for details.

02 / 10 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the sixteenth race in Russia are in! (Sorry for the delay - moving house!) Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Japan (Suzuka) THIS WEEKEND. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 5th October.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

16 / 09 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the fifteenth race at Singapore are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Russia in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 28th September.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

02 / 09 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the fourteenth race at Monza are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Singapore in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 14th September.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

26 / 08 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the thirteenth race at Spa are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Monza NEXT WEEKEND. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 31st August.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

29 / 07 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the twelfth race in Hungary are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. We're into the summer break now, the next race is Spa in four weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 24th August.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

22 / 07 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the eleventh race at Hockenheim are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Hungary NEXT WEEKEND. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 27th July.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

08 / 07 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the tenth race at Silverstone are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Hockenheim in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 20th July.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

01 / 07 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the ninth race in Austria are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Silverstone NEXT WEEKEND. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 6th July.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

24 / 06 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the eighth race at Paul Ricard are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Austria NEXT WEEKEND. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 29th June.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

10 / 06 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the seventh race in Canada are in, including the travesty that is Danny Ric not getting fastest lap. Sigh. Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Paul Ricard in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 22nd June.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going. Oh and by the way, half of us are being beaten by my girlfriend. So we might need to up our game a little.

29 / 05 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
Sorry for the delay! The results from the sixth race in Monaco are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Canada in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 8th June.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

13 / 05 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the fifth race in Barcelona are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Monaco in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 25th May.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

29 / 04 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the fourth race in Azerbaijan are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Barcelona in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 11th May.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed all the previous races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

15 / 04 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the third race in China are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is Azerbaijan in two weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 27th April.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed the first races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

08 / 04 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the second race in Bahrain are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Next race is China NEXT WEEKEND. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 13th April.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed the first races - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going. It's worth doing - if you'd missed Australia and then picked the perfect team for Bahrain, you'd be in the overall lead now! Special congratulations to The Big G, who jumped from plum last to 3rd place, largely due to the inspired choice of Pierre Gasly.

Note the Williams weightings have been increased due to them being shite.

25 / 03 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The results from the first race in Australia are in! Check the results or see where your team finished. Second race is Bahrain in 2 weeks. Cutoff for edits is midnight GMT on the night of Friday 6th April.

You can still enter a new team even if you missed the first race - you'll get a late starter bonus to help you get going.

18 / 03 / 2018
Fantasy F1:
The 2018 season is now open for entries! You can change your team as often as you like so you might as well pick a team now while you're thinking about it. You can always read the rules later! You have until midnight GMT on Friday night (23rd) to qualify for the first race in Australia.

 

 

Taxi

Taxi Cast: Jimmy Fallon, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Esposito, Gisele Bundchen, Henry Simmons, Ann-Margret. Directed by Tim Story.

Story: A New York cop and cabbie team up to defeat bank robbers.

Running Time: 1hr 37 minutes.

Certificate 12A.

 

Shallow movie alert! With Queen Latifah driving a souped-up cab and teaming up with an inept cop to chase a band of supermodel bank robbers, you know you're not going to be asked to contemplate the big questions of existence - unless you consider one of those questions to be about the size of thong currently in vogue with today's bank robbers. Yes, make no mistake, Taxi is a brain-off movie - and when treated as such is a likeable if average comedy jaunt through the skidmark-festooned streets of New York.

Buckle up for safety mutha-fu I must confess to not recognising Jimmy Fallon. In his first lead role here, he shows a promising talent as the impossibly incapable NYPD klutz, bringing zing to his lines with his affable and endearingly clumsy manner. Jennifer Esposito seems a little miscast as Fallon's ex and lieutenant, but she covers it well. Queen Latifah deepens her typecasting, but I don't think she will be bothered by that. She always looks like she's having so much fun making movies that she is always very watchable and can add charisma to even the drabbest scene. Ann-Margret appears briefly as Fallon's drunken mother, injecting another shot of charm and tang to help things drift nicely along. The supermodel Gisele Bundchen as the leader of the bank-robbing quartet is merely there to look good and thus is given few lines, mercifully. On the whole, the cast gels well and the partnership between Fallon and Latifah, albeit unlikely, is pleasingly entertaining.

It's all smoke and mirrors.

The best bits are, as you would expect from producer Luc Besson, the car sequences. Besson's M.O. is to make flamboyant and highly implausible action sequences that survive on their sheer style and coolness. The sequences in Taxi are not as ambitious as past efforts, but still serve to keep the adrenaline pumping and the story flowing. Tyres smoke, shiny cars dodge and weave through heavy traffic, continuity is abandoned - you know the score. The driving is all real and the camera swoops and dives to increase the impression of speed. Compare these sequences with, say, those from The Bourne Supremacy and they fare very badly indeed - Jason Bourne would have crashed at the first red light - but in this light comedy romp they work just fine. The opening sequence, for example, shows a bicycle courier dashing through New York in the most preposterous but entertaining fashion - and this works because it sets an expectation, it warns you not to take it seriously and so you are ready when the stakes are raised and the plausibility remains in the waste basket.

Jennifer Esposito and Jimmy Fallon discuss the significance of chutney in modern society. Summing-up time then, time to grade the report card. Taxi doesn't excel in any area, but it doesn't do anything badly either, so it ends up greater than the sum of its parts. It's lightweight nonsense for the young at heart and its stars make the film worth the price of a ticket. It's easy to advise you on this one - if you like empty nonsense with fast cars and fast banter, you won't be disappointed. If you need believability or any kind of substance in your action movies though, consign this Taxi to the breaker's yard.

I enjoyed this film: 3/5

I think the average moviegoer will enjoy it: 3/5

Testosterone Satisfaction Rating: 4/5 Car chases in Max Powered cars, supermodels in bikinis, guns.

To enjoy this film you should: forgive its emptiness.

 

To pre-order Taxi for its release date of 11th April 2005, use the link below:

Taxi [2004] [DVD]